The Devil's Wife Fights Back

Hubster and I have officially settled into Cinci, hunkered down over the holidays, gained a siamese twin apiece in alcohol and lardable chunkiness and are in the midst of surviving what can only be described as frozen hell.  We also took in some sporting events, made some new friends and celebrated one of my very best childhood friend's recent engagements in NC.  A hell of a start to 2014 if I do say so myself!

Then, yesterday happened.

According to people in mostly Alabama, if the sun is shining while it's raining, the devil is busy beating his wife.  Given the same context and what is happening outside my abode at this very moment, I'd say wifey decided to fight back.  Big time.  Home girl spent her holiday studying up on this:

maybe a little of this:

and has taken matters into her own hands, in a charming display of blistering winds and wind chills approaching -35.  Negative.  Thirty.  Five.

Sidenote: It took me forever to find this gif, I keep thinking these commercials are for insurance...

nice work AT&T.

To put that charming temperature into perspective, it is the same number of degrees different from freezing as the difference between freezing and 99 degrees.  There are warnings flying across my screen about exposed skin getting frostbite after 5 min.  Hubs stuck his nip on the window this morning to test out this theory, and appeared sorely disappointed to still have both after several minutes.

I am boiling water on the stove for warmth because my heat can't keep up.  [That's mostly a lie, it's because I wanted to make some of that bomb Aveda tea.  Hair products and crack-tea, who knew?]

Finnley has on her favorite ugly Christmas sweater and we have purchased her a new set of booties, which is much less entertaining than I had hoped.  But here she is channeling her inner Jessica Rabbit in her first encounter with snow a few weeks ago:

Survival mode kids, survival mode.  Even the local ski slope, Perfect North, is closed due to the cold...  I have yet to see this Perfect North... but considering the nearest hotel to it is at the airport, which I have flown into on several occassions, and I have yet to see anything even resembling a large hill in the area... I am highly suspicious of the slopeness and skiability...  Didn't stop me from getting this fuzzy piece of heaven last week!

North Face Osito

Recap of My Month Long Bender

Conscious decision to enjoy my weeks off during the holiday to unpack, organize, and explore Cincinnati and make some new friends in the process.  All while unplugging from this bad boy.

Without further a do, my December bender, in review:

Went to frigid Bengals games (twice).
Got harassed by large man behind us sick of the selfie-cam in his face, hence the photo of us in the bottom right.

Braved the latest Hobbit.  Unsure what part of the 14 part "trilogy" we are now on.
They are clearly all the same, and all entertaining nonetheless:
Hobbits fulfill little-people fetishes, Orlando bats for the other team, Dumbledore visits from Hogwarts.

Missed the Santacon memo.
Preparation have begun for next year.

Found Finnley a friend.
Meet Bertha, my new pet pelt.

Regretted not purchasing Galaxy Cat Pants from Target.

Reunited with roomie and friends from freshman year at UPenn!

Met up with my cousin and her bf in NYC!

Learned what it's like to fly out of not-Atlanta.

Saw the Nutcracker and washed it down with some amazing ice cream.
Added ice skating to our Cinci bucket list.

Checked out the home rival game of Xavier - Univ of Cincinnati.
They serve beer, so I don't know who won.

Celebrated Christmas our way, with meat, cheese and booze (also the traditional Ray crab bisque!)
The underage kid at the package store assured me Fireball + Rum Chata are what the kids drink these days... 

First bathroom stall selfie!
Added "maturity" to my 2014 Resolution list.

Explored Mt. Adams (patio bar).

Pre and post-gamed our NYE celebrations with these bad boys.

Toasted NYE at a delicious Italian place in OTR.
I do consider myself cooler because I know what OTR means and you don't.

Brought in the New Year with new friends, our next door neighbors!
Vowed never to return to the Cinci casino for fear of catching bankruptcy and airborne herpes.

Killed another animal for my new Eskimo jacket.
What did this fox say?  Nothing his grandmother would be proud to hear.

Got stuck in the airport for 8 hours trying to get to an engagement party I co-hosted for my childhood bestie.
Made some new friends [on my iPad].

Finally arrived to be greeted by this fool, unsure where the people driving the jetway were.
Waited another 30+ min for them to page someone to attach us to the airport.

Visited the gorgeous Raleigh outdoor museum, including Rodin sculpture garden for bff's engagement photos.
Not stealing her thunder, so I won't post any... but wow.  What a location and what a gorgeous couple!  Will link once she posts!

Link ups: Funday Monday, Transatlantic Blonde, Monday Bloom